Fritos

One favorite snack food? Fritos.

Never thought about them for years until my wife suggested we try them one day. “They are gluten-free,” she said, which is great, because my wife is gluten free for a few good reasons, as I also strive to be the same. What the hell, sure, let’s get some. Now with prices rapidly rising on snack food costs like a broken dam, I’ll enjoy this current bag pictured to the fullest.

Bobbi Jo Walsh used to talk me out of my bag of Fritos seemingly every kindergarten lunch break back at All Saints Schools. This would have been around 1965 or so, back when school was still tolerable for me. I’m not sure if it was her sweet disposition, or advanced salespersonship, but damn if she didn’t talk me out of that bag. ”How was your lunch at school today?” Aunt Boots would ask. I lived with my aunt, her daughters and her then-husband back on 4th street of Des Moines in the Highland Park neighborhood, which was a quiet, house-proud, and somewhat idyllic area to my eyes.” I wouldn’t know - she talked me out of my Fritos again”, I would sheepishly answer. I didn’t catch up on my Fritos jones until years later.

You check out the ingredients on a bag of Fritos and it’s not too bad - high salt and sodium, corn, yes, and you won’t get healthy eating a ton of them. Of course, not the point. Fritos, as legend has it, was developed by Charles Doolin back in San Antonio, in 1932. Chuck purchased the corn chip recipe from Gustavo Olguin, a local manufacturer. The rest is history, as is the Frito chip advertising. My generation remembers the presented - as - innocent, but pretty much outright racist Frito Bandito, laying out a couple of stereotypes of Hispanics and Mexicans as thieves and cartoon characters. Well, it happens - it was the time period. These days, those folks would probably look at that character, shake their heads and go,” White people - crazy mo’fo’s.”.

Several funeral dinners and church socials have been saved by some sort of Frito recipe. Dollars to doughnuts, there will usually be a baked dish, dip, or salad that has Fritos as the ingredient tucked away in it.

Back in my day, by cracky, your basic go-to lunch had a ham or pimento loaf sandwich, a carton of milk or juice, and a bag of Fritos. If your lunch maker was health conscious, then some grapes. Probably not my choice these days, but sometimes nostalgia hits me and I think, hmm, maybe that might not be a bad choice.

Sometimes I think, if the entire globe took a time out at noon, sat down with a bag of Fritos, and watched mindless television for 30 minutes, we could be better off. At least we would have 30 minutes of peace.